Afraid your coaching clients are going to ask you something you don’t know the answer to? Here’s what to do.

I recently came across a few new coaches expressing fear that they might not know the answer to a question a client asks them, and that is fantastic!  

One of the great things about coaching is that we do not need to provide answers to our clients, but assume that they already have the answers within and/or the resources to come up with an answer for themselves.

In a coaching context I almost never answer the questions my clients ask of me regarding advice for their situation.

So if that is the case, what can we do when a client asks us a question?

Here are some ways to handle those questions:

1.  Reflect the question back to them:
   • So, what do you think you should do in that situation?  You don’t know? What if you took a moment to silently reflect…  What answer do you come up with first?
     
2. Put them in your shoes:
   • If you were me, what would you tell you?  
     
3. Explore their desired answer:
   • What would you want me to tell you?
     
4. Transition to gather more information:
   • You know way more about yourself and your situation that I do.  Before we come up with a satisfactory solution for you, let’s take some time to explore…
     
5. Invite them to brainstorm possibilities:
   • That’s a great question.   Would you be open to brainstorming some potential paths/solutions for you?  What would you say first? Second?
     
6. Explore their personal history with these situations:
   • Have you ever effectively resolved this type of situation before? Never? Not one single time?  Oh you have? What specifically did you do? How did you do that? What resources did you use there?
     
7. Explore their perception of someone who could effectively handle the situation/solve the problem:
   • So that is the question that is on your mind?  Do you know someone who could manage that situation/answer that question to your satisfaction?  Who would that be? What would they tell you? How would they handle it? If you were them, would you be able to solve that?

We all have experience with someone giving us advice/solutions from their own model of the world and there are so many reasons that is not effective.  The solution doesn’t fit with our model of the world, they don’t have enough information to provide an appropriate solution, and even if the solution is appropriate there is a knowledge gap or a skill gap that prevents implementation or there may just be a belief or frame of mind in the way that prevents it from getting in or sticking.

More often than not our clients already know the answer/solution. The problem is not that they don’t know what to do, but that there is a blockage preventing them from acting upon it.

With these seven ways to redirect your clients to answer their own questions and discover their own solutions, not only can you dissolve your fear of ‘not knowing’ but you will greatly empower your clients and teach them to fish rather than giving them a fish that they probably wouldn’t even know how to cook anyways.

As always feel free to leave your questions, comments and contributions and I wish you more joy on your journey to coaching mastery.

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